What Can You Do To Help When Someone Is Grieving (MINISODE)

Grieving is a process we all go through at some point in life, and yet we have trouble being near those who are suffering when we are not. This minisode shares ideas on being there for those who are going through a loss when you are not.  

LISTEN TO HEATHER BRADLEY'S EPISODE: https://www.honestchristianconversations.com/walking-through-the-unthinkable/

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Chapters

• 0:00 Introduction to grief and loss
• 1:18 The absence of words for parent's loss
• 1:52 Being present without speaking
• 3:08 The discomfort of witnessing pain
• 4:20 Prayer request invitation
• 4:52 Closing thoughts on spiritual prompting

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Hey friends, welcome back to another mini-sode. This week's episode was very. There was a mix of emotions for me during this recording. I won't lie Before we started recording I was hoping I wouldn't cry at all, because the idea of losing a child is something that has always scared me.

Speaker 1: 0:22

I've been blessed that I have not lost a child. I have not had miscarriages, despite all the stupid things I've done in my life. God has been faithful and he has given me healthy children and I thank him for that, and I know I'm undeserving of it. But I do have people in my life who have lost their children, either in miscarriages or you know. I have a friend who just recently lost her brother. Yes, they're about my age, but still it's a loss. It's a loss for her parents, it's a loss for her. It's her younger brother.

Speaker 1: 0:59

Loss is not easy at any age. It certainly isn't. But when you are a parent and you are losing a child, that is a significant loss and I don't there isn't a word for it. I don't know if you've noticed that. You know we have a widow or a widower, but what do we call those who lose their children? I mean, we have an orphan if they lose their parents, but the ones who lose their children. There isn't a term for it and I don't understand why not. We should be there for each other when we are going through these tough situations, the people going through them. Like Heather said, she didn't need her grandmother to ask her if she was okay to give her sweet platitudes or encouraging Bible verses. She didn't need that when she was grieving. She just needed someone to be there for her. And that's what we should be doing for those who are grieving as well grieving their loss of their children and any loss. Really, it doesn't have to be a child, a loss of anything. Sometimes we just need to take that time away and have that silence, have somebody sit with us, cry with us, hold us, but they don't have to say anything. That, in and of itself, is a profound way to help someone heal, and the reason is because God does the work in that moment. He's the one speaking to this person through their pain and their suffering. They don't need you to say anything because God is going to say it and only speak when you need to speak.

Speaker 1: 2:31

Sometimes we say things and we mean well, but it doesn't hit them the way we were expecting, and a lot of people say that the reason why we can't be around people who are hurting is because it's uncomfortable for us who aren't doing the hurting. You know, and that's one of the reasons why we try so hard to make sure that they're happy and they're okay again. You know, buck up buttercup, everything will be fine. Because we don't want to deal with the uncomfortable emotions that come with their pain our friends, our family who are hurting, that come with their pain, our friends, our family who are hurting. And that's wrong, because we are supposed to weep with those who weep and rejoice with those who rejoice, not just rejoice weep with those who weep. If your spouse is going through a struggle, you're supposed to be there for them. If your friends are hurting because they have a loss, we should be there for them.

Speaker 1: 3:22

This is not something that has been easy for me to deal with either. I am very guilty of saying platitudes, and now I'm more aware of trying to think before I speak, because I've winced when I've said certain things to people who are hurting and I just feel like that was probably not something I needed to say. They probably heard it before. Why did I have to say anything I could have just said I'm praying for you. Sometimes that's okay. Don't feel obligated that you have to talk to somebody and tell them something profound. Sometimes the profound is just being there for them. Like Heather mentioned in this episode her grandma just being there with her having been through the same thing. That was enough of a healing for her, and sometimes that's what they need. So if you are struggling right now, if you are going through a loss of any kind right now and you just need someone to pray for you, I'm here for you.

Speaker 1: 4:16

Go to the show notes. There's a section that says do you have a prayer request? Click there and share your prayer request and I will pray for you. And your question for the day is when was the last time you reached out to somebody, when you felt them on your heart? Maybe you don't know why you felt them on your heart, maybe it's been forever since you talked to them, but they just popped in your head one day. You know you're driving, has absolutely nothing to do with them, but poof, there they are in your head and you're like why? Maybe God is trying to tell you something. So take that second and ask God what he wants you to do with that. Sometimes we reach out to people in their needs and we didn't know what was going to happen, but if you're obedient to that prompting, god can do miraculous things. In that, that's it for this mini. So God bless you all. Bye.